Don’t ask if you don’t want to Listen

I have found myself on more than one occasion asking for someone’s input when I really already had my mind made up. Then when their input was in opposition to my own predetermined decision I was more upset and argumentative than confused or uncertain.

Perhaps a better approach in the future will be to more directly frame the context of my conversation. Something along the lines of “Just so you are aware, I’m telling you, but I’ve already completely made up my mind on this…In fact, I’m pretty confident in my decision, so I’m looking for you to confirm my brilliance only…evidence to the contrary is unwelcome.”


Rather than framing my desired response, I will adjust my own mindset. Such that I am prepared to truly listen to the feedback I receive and accept it as a valid but contrary opinion or perhaps as added value to my initial position and likely complimentary if viewed from the proper perspective.

There are times when too many opinions just makes for inefficient decision-making. Just make the call and go. There are other decisions which warrant a sage sounding board. For these more strenuous calls, do your homework, but then check your ego at the door. If your adviser is worth their place in your mind, they want you to succeed more then they want to prove you wrong. Never be afraid to change your mind in the face of compelling information. You will gain respect for your willingness to listen and it will encourage additional valuable input.

If all else fails, look at it as an improvement to your initial idea. You can swallow that, right?


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